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one in this ♥ world
"The river runs and the river hides, Out to the ocean and under the sky, I promise you, the answer will come, Hold on to patience and watch for the sign, Everything in its time; " |
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about this blog
name's esther & 18's the number. i love potatoes to the ends of the earth and soups like nobody's business. & i believe in a
place "where love lasts forever".tagboard
affiliates
A7K1(: G.I.L ♥ (: Alex. Alvin. BingCong. Carole. Cherie. Chuhui. Emily. Dixie. Fiona. Gwen Hakim. Hannah. Hector. Joanna. Jocelyn. Junhui. Lydia. Nigel. Sharon. Ting Valerie. YanKai. happyther(: archives
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon. |
can anybody tell me what's the road in front of me? can anybody tell me where am i heading? looking at things, nothing seemed to be going right. everything got so jumbled up and confusing that a sense of hopelessness is filling in me. i so wish that i can just shout out "STOP!" and everything will. i really wish i can. i feel myself dragging my every step.. i'm starting to lose the energy, the life in me. now i understood how confused a person is when so many troubles and questions came crashing down on her. and when things got so messed up, she can no more figure out what's right and what's wrong anymore. there's so much in the head, that the mind's slowly shuttin down by itself and that is when she's reached her limit.. she can't think anymore. i can't think anymore. i wanted so much to make things better. i tried so hard, but nothing is turning out well. as a matter of fact, it seems like what i tried to do didn't make any difference or changes. and i guess that just simply means something. i din't do anything to make things better. i did nothing. that sense of hopelessness. tell me what to do.. xi wang jiu bu shi she wang. i really am hoping. people says hope keeps a person alive, it keeps a person going. that's why when a patient is dying from an unpredictable illness, only hope can keep him/her alive and the people around him/her. ok. what am i talking about. -.- i can't make out a smile on my face. i feel so dead that i think i can just rot if im isolated. maybe i should isolate myself. from everyone and from everything. i've lost myself already i guess. i don't feel anything in me. i feel empty. this morning i woke up to realise that, " oh, it's another day." but i just shut my mind off again, and went back to sleep. i dont feel like waking up. i don't want to. and i don't know why i kept looking at the phone each time i woke up. im hoping, eventhough i know i'll see nothing. and yes, i saw nothing. it's ok. i expected it anyway. still hoping. thing's just ain't getting any better. im hoping it will. but i don't know if it will.. will it? i know very well of the truest feelings deep down inside me. and i've said it. "be honest with each other. " and i've decided to. those are my honest words. and there's nv a trace of lie in it. i don't care what i'm going to face ahead, but i will nv regret sending you that msg, eventhough that again din't make any difference. because those are my words, my feelings, my emotions and my thoughts. not for anybody, but just for you. just you. i don't care how much it is to take to suffer, but if i have to, i'll take it. if i'm to be gone for one good day, will you be there to watch me leave? |
