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one in this ♥ world
"The river runs and the river hides, Out to the ocean and under the sky, I promise you, the answer will come, Hold on to patience and watch for the sign, Everything in its time; " |
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about this blog
name's esther & 18's the number. i love potatoes to the ends of the earth and soups like nobody's business. & i believe in a
place "where love lasts forever".tagboard
affiliates
A7K1(: G.I.L ♥ (: Alex. Alvin. BingCong. Carole. Cherie. Chuhui. Emily. Dixie. Fiona. Gwen Hakim. Hannah. Hector. Joanna. Jocelyn. Junhui. Lydia. Nigel. Sharon. Ting Valerie. YanKai. happyther(: archives
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed Do credit accordingly if you changed the icon. |
i feel sad now. i don't know. i feel sad all of a sudden. haha. are you thinking " huh? is it me? " now? lol. don't worry. it's nothing to do with you. i don't know why this sense of sadness just rush into me aft i read her blog. things just isn't the same anymore. i don't even know whether i'll be able to do something to turn things around again. it'll feel weird. i feel separated. it's the kind of sadness like when you realised we're not anymore in someone's world. someone who's really close to you, once upon a time. that's how im feeling right now. have i lost yet another friend? .. sighs. came back from youth camp yesterday morning. im feelin so lethargic la. im falling asleep almost everwhere, and those legs. it's totally killing me. man. haha. went home took a nap ( not really a nap. it feels like i've slept for like 14 hrs? but i only slept for 2hrs? haha) im so sorry calv. that you have to wait for me to wake up. and you have to wait all alone. (for goodness sake.) im really sorry. at night, went to attend our school's band concert. it was awesome. like always(: haha. i don't know. i love the band. ever since don't know when. lol. and you tell me a very funny thing. im still thinking bout it okay. " i feel very troubled over something. but i don't know what's it. just very troubled." "partly.. yea. but there's another part. " and i was like huh? what thing?? lol. but what i aprreciated is that, you told me you're troubled over something, and not just troubling and troubling by yourseld and give a really i-don't-feel-like-talking look. at least you told me, and kept from guessing. yes, i appreciated. but still, what is it?? LOL. why are you so nice yesterday? lol. my definition of nice. you're all laughy and so talky. (: well really, i've nv seen you laugh and talk for so long. and (: , your laughs influenced me. it feels really nice. and deep inside i was really afraid and prayin real hard that we'll continue to be like this all the way back. and.. it did (: i've said before i wanted joy really badly. yes, i think i captured some joy yesterday. (: thanks to you. i like you. (: we'll never learn to cherish until we lost the chance to. i'll always agree to this. sometimes in life, we'll just have to keep things simple and just learn to look at the happy side of things. why make things so complicating and then end up feeling all shitty. whenever i watched chong shang yun xiao and saw yishan feeling all sad and troubled aft quarelling with yunzhi, i don't know.. i just seem to be able to feel how she's feeling. and at the episode when things are gonna change so dramatically, when they were having cold war with each other and yunzhi made a decision that they should give each other some space to think things over carefully.. i knew how yishan felt. and at the last night when they'll be together.. yunzhi said something that made me cry until like some shit. " this is our last night sleeping together, can i ask you a favour? .... can i hold your hands to sleep for this last night? .." and the fact that this is really the last time they'll be together (becos yunzhi will bdie in a car accident) made me completely mad. you know those times when you just feel like crawling into the tv yourself and made things ok? haha. i felt like doing that. whe cant they just think simply and not look back at the past anymore. is the past that important? doesn't the present and the future matter most? we'll nv know when we can't turn things back again until it happened. in relationships, we quarrel, we make mistakes. each quarrels, we'll tell ourselves that things will be fine after some time. but what if it will never? i hate to bear regrets. and i don't want to have any. i know we'll never think about things like death or illness. they're so drama la. haha. but they really do happen. what if it happens? hmmm. thinking. got to rush to the train station. when something is of more than value, it's no more valuable. it is precious. |
